Dirty Discipline

UGGHH! Discipline has reared its head again! Being a disciple means discipline, but seriously, aren't I doing well enough to pass the "she's a good person" test? If I'm gonna be honest (and good people need to be) I would have to say no. Surprised? I fall short in several areas, but the common theme in all of my shortcomings is laziness (aka lack of discipline). UUUGGGHHH again!

But this week I made a step in the right direction - I joined an accountability team at my church. Now I may still be weak, but hopefully having to share the depth of my failures will motivate me to fail less. And when I do struggle, hopefully their cheering and encouragement (and tough love, I'm sure) will help me strive to get over the hump of the huge rut I'm in.

It's not good to be alone. Not for too long anyway. Jesus surrounded HIMself with men (who also had faults, by the way) and Paul encourages believers to be sure meet with each other regularly. Then there's the whole "cord of three won't break" idea. We are stronger together. We can be better together. So where did the strong loner idea get such a foothold in my life?

I like my alone time. I love to meditate on GOD's Word without interruption and write my poems without the input or distraction of others. I even enjoy the quiet silence of a rainy day. I like to stay home and not have to go anywhere. But where does that all lead - look how each sentence started (I, I, I, I...) see where I'm going? When you are your only company, then only your opinion matters and your entire world circles around self. Not a good state of being. But when we meet with others we allow them to shape us, we allow their ideas to challenge us, and their iron sharpens ours.

This is where the discipline comes in. It's not easy to let others shape what we selfishly think is fine (just ask any personal trainer!) But GOD did not create us to be stagnant creatures. And it isn't easy for us to get up for something we know will not feel good. But ask Jesus how it felt when HE didn't want to be on the cross. HE would still say it was worth it. (Billions of times over it was worth it! It was worth it for each individual!)

So I guess this was my pep talk. I'm kicking my butt into gear with these words. And my first accountability team meeting will be coming up soon. UGGH! But I will do this and I will be better for it! (Hmmm...an act of will....)